So, the 3Ls made their own list. Here [corrected from the print version] are the results as announced at the Barrister’s Ball. The mostly likely to...
• Marry a client is Lewis Stoddard.
• Marry their secretary is Lewis Stoddard and Seth Gordon.
• Become a professor is Seth Gordon.
• Become a politician is Brian Wonderlich.
• Be a criminal defense lawyer is Chris Christensen
(close runners up Megan Yeates, Tom Lyden)
• Be a civil rights lawyer is Solmaz Rafiee-Tari.
• Be a prosecutor is Dave Whipple and Nikki Owens.
• Become the next Johnnie Cochran is Dean Bennett.
• Become an advocate for exotic flowers in the Amazon is Amber Ellis (close runners up, Ray Thompson, Brad Willis, and Abbi Baron).
• Open a bar after law school is Jim Bielenberg (close runner up LemMackedon).
• Be the most fashionable in court is Jordan Leroy (close runner up Stephanie Sterling).
• Wear a polyester suit to court is Brad Willis.
• Be the next Judge Judy is Katie Garcia (close runners up Pele Peacock and Keisha Oxendine).
• Be on the Idaho Supreme Court is Brian Wonderlich.
• Use law books as coffee table books is Zach Thompson (close runner up Phu Chau).
• Use “I am a lawyer” as a pickup line is Lance Fuisting.
• Take their dog to court is Jacque Groff.
• Become the next Nancy Grace is Katie Garcia.
• Sue Wal-Mart is Maban Smith.
• Defend Wal-Mart is Andy Jolly.
• To marry and open a practice are Rob Berry and Sara Bearce, and Megan Mooney and Brian Wonderlich.
Monday, April 30, 2007
News Briefs
Grades, standings available in June
As finals approach, the specter of grades can’t be far behind. In an e-mail sent last week, the law school’s pseudo-registrar Sande Schlueter said students can expect to see their grades via the university’s online Banner service by June 2. When they are completely uploaded, she will send an e-mail notification to that effect. Sande asks that students not e-mail her asking when grades will be posted.
Standings are processed after grades are turned in and posted and should be available shortly after June 11. Once processed, the standings are final and are not calculated again until after fall semester.
Summer remodel will focus on technology upgrades
Over the summer, the law school will begin extensive renovations of the Courtroom and Room 104 that will leave them upgraded but unusable for part of the Fall semester. Construction in 104 will likely be completed by the end of September and the Courtroom should be finished by the end of the semester.
Work in both rooms will focus on technology upgrades and acoustic improvements. The rooms will also be made compliant with changes in the building code and Americans with Disabilities Act.
“The courtroom is going to have technology installed in it that will enable our students to be trained to practice in the most modern courtrooms in the country,” Dean Rich Seamon said.
Other summer projects will replace the current carrels in the second floor with new ones similar to those in the basement and replace the furnishings in the student lounge. The lounge may get new carpet and paint but those projects have not been confirmed. Dean Seamon confirmed that the only game table that will remain in the lounge is the ping-pong table.
Some Fall classes to be held across the street
Due to construction projects in room 104, large-enrollment classes will not be held in the law school until October. Instead, classes that do not fit in either of the smaller rooms will be held somewhere in the general campus. The law school has not confirmed a replacement location yet but Dean Seamon said that the school would likely hold classes in the Borah Theater in the Student Union Building.
As finals approach, the specter of grades can’t be far behind. In an e-mail sent last week, the law school’s pseudo-registrar Sande Schlueter said students can expect to see their grades via the university’s online Banner service by June 2. When they are completely uploaded, she will send an e-mail notification to that effect. Sande asks that students not e-mail her asking when grades will be posted.
Standings are processed after grades are turned in and posted and should be available shortly after June 11. Once processed, the standings are final and are not calculated again until after fall semester.
Summer remodel will focus on technology upgrades
Over the summer, the law school will begin extensive renovations of the Courtroom and Room 104 that will leave them upgraded but unusable for part of the Fall semester. Construction in 104 will likely be completed by the end of September and the Courtroom should be finished by the end of the semester.
Work in both rooms will focus on technology upgrades and acoustic improvements. The rooms will also be made compliant with changes in the building code and Americans with Disabilities Act.
“The courtroom is going to have technology installed in it that will enable our students to be trained to practice in the most modern courtrooms in the country,” Dean Rich Seamon said.
Other summer projects will replace the current carrels in the second floor with new ones similar to those in the basement and replace the furnishings in the student lounge. The lounge may get new carpet and paint but those projects have not been confirmed. Dean Seamon confirmed that the only game table that will remain in the lounge is the ping-pong table.
Some Fall classes to be held across the street
Due to construction projects in room 104, large-enrollment classes will not be held in the law school until October. Instead, classes that do not fit in either of the smaller rooms will be held somewhere in the general campus. The law school has not confirmed a replacement location yet but Dean Seamon said that the school would likely hold classes in the Borah Theater in the Student Union Building.
FUISTOS
by Ty Bair
In honor of the graduation of the perennially hard-working LANCE FUISTING, Inter Alia presents
FUISTOS ...
... to Professor LAURIE O’NEAL for hosting a small party at her house in support of the BSA. The party was utterly without incident. No shower doors were broken, no faces were scarred, and no Subarus were barfed within.
... to 1L student MEGAN BARTLEY, who took down third place in the 9th Annual Palouse Invitational Wet T-shirt Contest at the Hyde-Out Tavern in Colfax, Wash. on March 2, besting 2L student TED REINBOLD.
... to 2L student “Anonymous” THOMAS RODGERS, whose first act as SBA Sergeant-at-Arms was to ban full golf swings in the basement. The new policy will still allow chips, flops, putts, pitches, punches and “other utility shots.”
... to 2L student WILLIAM KENDALL FLETCHER on finally resetting the clock. He just now realized it was daylight savings time.
... to 5L student BRIAN BUCKHAM, whose knowledge of Criminal Law will soon be tested for the 400-500th times.
In honor of the graduation of the perennially hard-working LANCE FUISTING, Inter Alia presents
FUISTOS ...
... to Professor LAURIE O’NEAL for hosting a small party at her house in support of the BSA. The party was utterly without incident. No shower doors were broken, no faces were scarred, and no Subarus were barfed within.
... to 1L student MEGAN BARTLEY, who took down third place in the 9th Annual Palouse Invitational Wet T-shirt Contest at the Hyde-Out Tavern in Colfax, Wash. on March 2, besting 2L student TED REINBOLD.
... to 2L student “Anonymous” THOMAS RODGERS, whose first act as SBA Sergeant-at-Arms was to ban full golf swings in the basement. The new policy will still allow chips, flops, putts, pitches, punches and “other utility shots.”
... to 2L student WILLIAM KENDALL FLETCHER on finally resetting the clock. He just now realized it was daylight savings time.
... to 5L student BRIAN BUCKHAM, whose knowledge of Criminal Law will soon be tested for the 400-500th times.
We dress, you decide
by Travis Woodland and SODA
You know, sometimes it’s easy to say you like homos, and sometimes it’s not. I don’t mean “like” like – that’s always hard. Ask a homo. They’ll tell you.
The Sexual Orientation Diversity Alliance (SODA) recently asked its fellow law students to show a little support for their gay brethren by wearing denim on April 18. “Why denim?” you may have asked yourself. The simple answer is this: to trick you. No, really. If you wore jeans, you like gays (and lesbians, bisexuals, and transgendereds).
Obviously the last sentence was a lie. Denim does not make anyone a liker of anything but denim. The real purpose behind the “Day of Silence” (jeans day) was to get people to think. That might seem an anachronism in a law school, but it really isn’t. How many times since your first day in this building have you thought about how your actions and words affect other people, and not just those that SODA tries to represent? I certainly don’t very often.
It’s a small world here at UI-Law, and nobody wants to be left out. We all make assumptions about our fellow students: Mormons, Catholics, atheists, African Americans, Asians, gays, ex-military, men, women, drinkers, druggies, sobers, parents, bachelors(and ettes), socialites, quiet people – all of them. I’ll let you in on a poorly kept secret: Few of those assumptions are true.
Asking people to wear denim might seem like a strange segue into the whole “when you assume you make an ass out of you and me” argument, but it really isn’t. The clothes someone wears can lead to just as many assumptions about a person as any other aspect of their life. Jeans represent comfort, the fashion equivalent of feeling like you belong and aren’t going to be singled out based on someone’s assumptions about you. How comfortable would you be in your favorite pair of denim if it became the new ‘gay thing’ to wear? Besides, we couldn’t have asked you to dress up in suits; many students won’t even do that for the Idaho Supreme Court.
Nearly everyone in the law school donned their Silvertabs, Tuffskins, and Gap relaxed fits, with a few notable exceptions. To those who wrote their feelings about gay rights, even those whose feelings don’t embrace the ideals of SODA: thank you. The point of having discussions about human rights, gay or otherwise, isn’t to force a viewpoint on someone; it is to ask people to think about why they feel how they do. Much like faith, an opinion is only worth something if can withstand test and attack.
Unfortunately, some of our students chose not to wear denim. I don’t mean that they forgot and wore dress pants because they always do. Some people (you know who you are – and so do we), always wear jeans; just not on a day when wearing jeans might make people think they supported the homos. However, their fears were unfounded: there is no way any of us would have thought you supported gay rights. But, thanks for the brutal honesty.
Don’t worry, the gays don’t hate you. In fact, you may find yourself getting a little more gay attention in your life than you want because you just became one of SODA’s top priorities. This is one closet you can’t go back into.
By the way, if anyone wants to have a day to celebrate the rights of heterosexuals, SODA will be on board. Just let us know what to wear. I suggest a nice pair of tight wranglers.
You know, sometimes it’s easy to say you like homos, and sometimes it’s not. I don’t mean “like” like – that’s always hard. Ask a homo. They’ll tell you.
The Sexual Orientation Diversity Alliance (SODA) recently asked its fellow law students to show a little support for their gay brethren by wearing denim on April 18. “Why denim?” you may have asked yourself. The simple answer is this: to trick you. No, really. If you wore jeans, you like gays (and lesbians, bisexuals, and transgendereds).
Obviously the last sentence was a lie. Denim does not make anyone a liker of anything but denim. The real purpose behind the “Day of Silence” (jeans day) was to get people to think. That might seem an anachronism in a law school, but it really isn’t. How many times since your first day in this building have you thought about how your actions and words affect other people, and not just those that SODA tries to represent? I certainly don’t very often.
It’s a small world here at UI-Law, and nobody wants to be left out. We all make assumptions about our fellow students: Mormons, Catholics, atheists, African Americans, Asians, gays, ex-military, men, women, drinkers, druggies, sobers, parents, bachelors(and ettes), socialites, quiet people – all of them. I’ll let you in on a poorly kept secret: Few of those assumptions are true.
Asking people to wear denim might seem like a strange segue into the whole “when you assume you make an ass out of you and me” argument, but it really isn’t. The clothes someone wears can lead to just as many assumptions about a person as any other aspect of their life. Jeans represent comfort, the fashion equivalent of feeling like you belong and aren’t going to be singled out based on someone’s assumptions about you. How comfortable would you be in your favorite pair of denim if it became the new ‘gay thing’ to wear? Besides, we couldn’t have asked you to dress up in suits; many students won’t even do that for the Idaho Supreme Court.
Nearly everyone in the law school donned their Silvertabs, Tuffskins, and Gap relaxed fits, with a few notable exceptions. To those who wrote their feelings about gay rights, even those whose feelings don’t embrace the ideals of SODA: thank you. The point of having discussions about human rights, gay or otherwise, isn’t to force a viewpoint on someone; it is to ask people to think about why they feel how they do. Much like faith, an opinion is only worth something if can withstand test and attack.
Unfortunately, some of our students chose not to wear denim. I don’t mean that they forgot and wore dress pants because they always do. Some people (you know who you are – and so do we), always wear jeans; just not on a day when wearing jeans might make people think they supported the homos. However, their fears were unfounded: there is no way any of us would have thought you supported gay rights. But, thanks for the brutal honesty.
Don’t worry, the gays don’t hate you. In fact, you may find yourself getting a little more gay attention in your life than you want because you just became one of SODA’s top priorities. This is one closet you can’t go back into.
By the way, if anyone wants to have a day to celebrate the rights of heterosexuals, SODA will be on board. Just let us know what to wear. I suggest a nice pair of tight wranglers.
Dear RJ
by RJ Linnan
Confidential to DVT
Blue Grapefruit. BLUE GRAPEFRUIT! DEAR, GOD, BLUEGRAPEFRUITBLUEGRAPEFRUIT!!!
Dear RJ,
I thought that the designation of classes as 2L or 3L was merely a warning that a designated 2L course could conflict with a required or bar related 3L course, and not that a designated course would be reserved for one class or the other. Can you explain this?
Student who Can’t Really Enter What Ever Division
Dear SCREWED,
Clearly you fail to understand the fact that students in law school shouldn’t get to choose which teacher they take a given class from. Just because the previous policy was to simply be a planning factor for when classes would be offered doesn’t mean that the administration shouldn’t change the policy and give priority to 2L’s. Never mind that 3Ls might actually need the class for when they graduate. Even though every registration process in higher education across the country is generally first-come, first-serve, doesn’t mean that our school should do it that way. Just take bankruptcy instead of tax. They’re basically the same thing.
I am confused by the many different statements that I am asked to make here at law school. I thought that jeans were for rape awareness, red ribbons were for heart health awareness, pink ribbons were for breast awareness, and yellow ribbons meant that I thought Lance Armstrong was hot. A little clarity?
Dumbfounded About Denim
Dear DAD
You have it all wrong. The more important consideration is whether you comply with every request to paint, wear, or pin for whatever the cause du’jour is that day. So, basically, even if there is no rational relationship between a “message” like yellow bracelets and Lance Armstrong’s testicles, or the fact that you were going to wear jeans to school anyway, you still must comply with the request for solidarity or be labeled an asshole.
I have a problem with one of my professors. I have never raised my hand in his class, because he would just cut me off anyway. He is always preaching his crazy politics in class and insulting my point of view instead of actually teaching anything and I don’t know what to do?
Really Annoyed at Teacher
Dear RAT
You are absolutely right to not raise your hand and voice your opinions and arguments in class. Why bother when the professor won’t listen anyway? It would probably just offend the professor if you spoke too, and that puts your grade at risk since all professors can access your exam number. What you should do instead of confronting the professor is rush straight to the dean’s office and complain as loudly as possible about your voice being silenced and your opinion going unheard.
When you’re a lawyer, RAT, you won’t have to confront opposing counsel, or a judge who disagrees with you, you’ll just be able to contact the State Bar and issue a complaint because of the disagreement. Ideally a representative from the Bar will come to your rescue by arriving at your next meeting a few minutes late and manage to interrupt your nemesis so you don’t have to do any speaking at all.
Confidential to DVT
Blue Grapefruit. BLUE GRAPEFRUIT! DEAR, GOD, BLUEGRAPEFRUITBLUEGRAPEFRUIT!!!
• • •
Dear RJ,
I thought that the designation of classes as 2L or 3L was merely a warning that a designated 2L course could conflict with a required or bar related 3L course, and not that a designated course would be reserved for one class or the other. Can you explain this?
Student who Can’t Really Enter What Ever Division
Dear SCREWED,
Clearly you fail to understand the fact that students in law school shouldn’t get to choose which teacher they take a given class from. Just because the previous policy was to simply be a planning factor for when classes would be offered doesn’t mean that the administration shouldn’t change the policy and give priority to 2L’s. Never mind that 3Ls might actually need the class for when they graduate. Even though every registration process in higher education across the country is generally first-come, first-serve, doesn’t mean that our school should do it that way. Just take bankruptcy instead of tax. They’re basically the same thing.
• • •
Dear RJ,I am confused by the many different statements that I am asked to make here at law school. I thought that jeans were for rape awareness, red ribbons were for heart health awareness, pink ribbons were for breast awareness, and yellow ribbons meant that I thought Lance Armstrong was hot. A little clarity?
Dumbfounded About Denim
Dear DAD
You have it all wrong. The more important consideration is whether you comply with every request to paint, wear, or pin for whatever the cause du’jour is that day. So, basically, even if there is no rational relationship between a “message” like yellow bracelets and Lance Armstrong’s testicles, or the fact that you were going to wear jeans to school anyway, you still must comply with the request for solidarity or be labeled an asshole.
• • •
Dear RJI have a problem with one of my professors. I have never raised my hand in his class, because he would just cut me off anyway. He is always preaching his crazy politics in class and insulting my point of view instead of actually teaching anything and I don’t know what to do?
Really Annoyed at Teacher
Dear RAT
You are absolutely right to not raise your hand and voice your opinions and arguments in class. Why bother when the professor won’t listen anyway? It would probably just offend the professor if you spoke too, and that puts your grade at risk since all professors can access your exam number. What you should do instead of confronting the professor is rush straight to the dean’s office and complain as loudly as possible about your voice being silenced and your opinion going unheard.
When you’re a lawyer, RAT, you won’t have to confront opposing counsel, or a judge who disagrees with you, you’ll just be able to contact the State Bar and issue a complaint because of the disagreement. Ideally a representative from the Bar will come to your rescue by arriving at your next meeting a few minutes late and manage to interrupt your nemesis so you don’t have to do any speaking at all.
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